Lesson & a taste of fear

I am so excited!  Discovered a blog entry I'd written on December 15, 2006.  It is now over two years later and my, the changes, the mindset shift I have endured.  It's kinda amazing.  Today I attended an AMAZING meditation session where a guest speaker presented his experience with manifestation, and with creating the life that we want. My entry was very similar to what he talked about.  And while it was written that long ago, I am NOW, two years later seeing the fruits of what I'd written about THEN:

I am ready to move forward - to fully develop this artistic aspect of me I've denied for so long. For very many years I have seen, encountered, people entrenched in living their dreams.  I have felt jealous because somehow in my life I believed,  or told myself that while everyone else could,  I couldn't live my dreams.  I thereby subconsciously made choices and developed resentments;  creating an existence with which I was extremely dissatisfied. Self imposed mental imprisonment.

No more.

I will surround myself with people who are living their lives true to who they are. It is my hope that by accepting and releasing them to be themselves, I will be giving myself permission to likewise be true TO my self, to live MY best life, whatever I deem that to be.

Today I consciously choose the beginning of the rest of my life.. I am co-creater of my existence, along with The First Creator, who created me, and totally WANTS me to do that which I'VE wanted to do ALL of my life--- TO CREATE! The insanity of it is I HAVE been creating, knowingly or not, I have been creating. It's time to now create that which I've desired all along.

What I desire shall be.

I know this can sound so "woo woo out there" for one uninitiated, but promise to keep an open mind.  The gist of what the speaker talked about was a reinforcement that we do create our realities.  We manifest or create continually; but as a result of fear, we continually create that which causes us misery.  Because face it, we are dissatisfied, miserable, unhappy, with so much:  our jobs, our relationships, our financial outlooks.  You name it, we are unhappy about it, yet we continue to create or manifest it.

He also mentioned that the greatest motivations common to humans is that we go to great lengths to pursue pleasure, and avoid pain.   In his observations, humans pursue the misery because they believe it is less painful than pursuing the good.

Now a large part of why we are leery to create greater, better realities is fear.  And while we know many things about fear; like that it is "false evidence appearing real", and "the greatest thing to fear is fear itself" and etc. he suggested an alternate way of looking at it.

What he shared today blew my mind because it resonated with my spirit so much.  He said that fear, while a restrictor,  tells you that there is an aspect of yourself that you need to look at and explore. He added, however,  that we are to look at this as a FUN thing!

So, while the normal reaction when confronted with fear is to agree with the fear and avoid whatever you're fearful of;  he suggests you go in the direction you're resistant to.  Additionally, if there are people you admire and would like to be more like, he encourages that you likewise emulate those very characteristics in them that make you uncomfortable - (that you're fearful of).

This new information gave me much to chew. After the class, my sister and I had an opportunity to practice an aspect in the process of manifestation, and I was immediately confronted with a quiet fear while at a Lexus dealership.  This fear showed the presence of a belief system I held, that needed to be explored in a FUN way!  :).

Oh joy.  I was really very surprised because I didn't think this was a problem I still toted!  A sense of inferiority - unworthiness, I mean COME ON?!?  Nonetheless, I had to do what had been suggested in class just an hour ago.

I made myself slowly walk in there, go to each car, admire, look in; I made myself comfortable by causing myself to believe on a molecular level, that I had every right to be there.  It wasn't for me to determine why I felt what I felt, I had to quickly be at home in that environment, and banish and change any thoughts that said otherwise.

What an experience - I had a wonderful time!  My sister ended up test-driving her dream vehicle. I wound up approaching and conversing with another Lexus owner and just being at home in the dealership.  Pretty soon we headed to the Saturn dealership to look at my desired vehicle.  We were fully practicing the last step we'd been given in the manifesting process:  that after identifying the desire and visualizing or imagining the desire;  we pursued that which gave us the highest excitement!  In our cases, to GO and see, touch,  smell, feel, drive and  be the cars.

How and or how they come is not our business.. that is Spirit's job.  But oh, what fun to live like this! Spontaneously, joyously, alive and in the moment;  pursuing that which brings us the greatest excitement!

Create the life you want! Change your situation by changing your thoughts, by changing your self!

© 2009 MP Mokeyane.